We went to Dr. Pusey today about the twitching in Mariah's left leg and he says that it it focal seizures. I was very surprised about that but he said that not all seizures involve losing consciousness like what we have seen with Mariah's seizures so far. He said that it depends on what part of the brain the seizure is in, that's why they call them focal seizures. They are focalized in one part of the brain that controls what the seizure affects. He added a new medication called Vimpat and after 7 days of being on it, she is going to stop taking the Zonagran. Right now she is on Kepra XR and Zonagran. She will start the new meds tomorrow morning, taking one in the am and one in the evening. I am really crossing my fingers and hoping that this medicine helps and stops the seizures all together.

In the meantime, I am still working on trying to get insurance, but it is slow going. Why does this have to be so difficult? I feel like I hit a brick wall everywhere I turn. After we get the insurance in place, we will finally get to go to MUSC in Charleston to have tests run to see if there is anything they can do to get rid of the seizures once and for all. I know that involves some type of surgery, but I hate seeing her in so much pain all the time.

Last night Mariah had another leg twitching episode in her left leg. I am almost positive that it is her sciatic nerve. When I pressed on that area, she said that it relieved the pain. She went and got a tennis ball from my Mom, so I hope she uses it to do those exercises to help reduce those episodes.

We are still waiting on insurance. I am trying to apply for the plan through the government, but am waiting on the denial from "regular" insurance in order to send the application in. Lord knows when it will be all complete. I don't how much more she can take of this waiting and feeling in limbo. I just want it to all be over with. I want nothing more than for them to be able to find a way to get rid of the seizures all together, but it will involve major surgery and I am scared for Mariah to go through that. But, I think that it will be better than having to endure all of the seizures and the after effects. Just crossing our fingers and praying really hard!!!

Sunday, August 8, I took Mariah to The Old Mill to do a photo shoot. Her friend Ariel met her there and after the photo shoot, she called me and said that Arial would bring her home. When they got home, she asked me if she could spend the night with Arial in North Augusta. Mariah seemed in a pretty cheerful mood to be getting out of the house and spending time with a friend. I talked to her on Monday and she said that she had a seizure Sunday night but that Ariel was with her when it happened and that she was ok. She spent Monday night at Ariel's as well. When she got home on Tuesday, she was very tired and went to lay down in my bed pretty early. At 11:00 pm, I went to bed and heard Mariah whimpering. She said that her leg was twitching. Her left leg was twitching like when she is seizing. I rubbed her leg with lotion and had her press her foot against my hands as hard as she could. She said that it helped and the twitching finally stopped. She had another episode with the right leg twitching on Wednesday (August 11) evening. I did the same thing, rubbed her leg and had her press down on my hands as hard as she could. I am not sure what is causing this twitching in her legs.

Mariah had a seizure on Thursday, August 5 at approx. 5:45 pm. I had gotten home from work and she wanted to go to Target to get some baby blocks as a photography prop for a weekend photo shoot. I really did not want to go anywhere after working all day so I asked her if we could please go Friday night instead. She was disappointed, but agreed. I started to make supper and she was standing in the kitchen with me and I was talking to her, but she did not answer me. I looked over and she had a blank stare on her face. I asked her if she heard me and she sorta snapped out of her daze and said she didn't feel good. I walked out of the kitchen toward my bedroom and then went into the bathroom. Dakota yelled out that Mariah was having a seizure. When I got into the living room, she was face down, seizing. She kept hitting her head on the floor and I could not move her, so I put my hand under her forehead so she at least would not be hitting her head so hard. She finally stopped seizing and I got her turned over to her side, but started seizing again. It lasted approximately 10 minutes, but I think that it was a series of seizures, not just the one or two. When she finally opened her eyes, she did not know who I was and she was even terrified of our dog, Milo. It took me about 15 minutes to get her to get up off the floor and I put her in my bed. She still did not know who I was. I kept checking on her every few minutes for about 30 minutes. Around 6:30 she called out to me and asked me why was she in my bed. She got out of bed and went to sit on the couch. She complained the rest of the night about a severe head ache. She did take her meds and a muscle relaxer around 7:00, which is the normal time to take her meds.

I am starting this blog to document and vent about my daughter's seizures. My daughter, Mariah is of of the most beautiful, talented and courageous people I know! She was diagnosed with seizure disorder in July of 2009. It has been the longest and frustrating struggle. I hate feeling so helpless. I can not even imagine how she feels. As a mom, I'm supposed to protect my children, but there is not a damn thing I can do about this, except keep my calm and pray. Pray a lot.